A word to the partners of those experiencing impotence
Any man who is experiencing problems of sexual performance is likely to feel angry, frustrated and afraid of rejection. In other words, he feels exactly the same way that you do. This underlines the basic truth that, when there are sexual problems in a relationship, both parties are affected. If you do not deal with these problems, they fester and may ultimately destroy your relationship.
How to begin
There is no right way to begin the discussion with your partner. If you have read the rest of the information on this website, you have actually taken a vital first step because you have begun to learn about the problem and its causes. You should have a better understanding of how your partner feels. You now understand not only that impotence is physically and emotionally complicated, but also that it is usually treatable, often using a drug like Cialis.
To talk or not to talk
You now need to bring your partner “up to speed”. How you do this will depend on the nature and strength of your relationship. Whatever you do should appear non-threatening. He already has considerable worry and anxiety about his inability to perform consistently (or at all). If you come over as confrontational, he will retreat even further into his shell. So you need to think about him as a person.
- How does he react in different situations?
- Is there a “best” way to raise this issue with alarming him?
- What coping strategies can you devise? What can you offer to do to help him overcome the problem?
Whatever the approach you devise, should help to relieve the stress he is feeling and to build a spirit of co-operation between the two of you.
There is one further reason for opening the discussion. Impotence may be a symptom of more serious medical problems. If he only focuses on what he perceives to be his current sexual inadequacy, he may completely fail to take early steps to address the more serious underlying cause.
So many treatments for cancer and other serious conditions are effective because they are an early intervention. So many men find that more drastic measures are required because they delayed seeking diagnosis until it was almost or actually too late.
Support
Talking about the risks of not seeing a doctor may separate the emotional overtones from the physical issues. Hopefully, you still love him even though he is having sexual problems and you do not want to lose him to a disease. Even if the worst should be confirmed, the quality of your relationship during the difficult days of treatment will be far better. Ignoring the problem will only lead to you feeling guilty because you failed to take action and resentment from him that his problems were undiagnosed. Supporting each other openly and honestly is always the best foundation for a relationship.
Talking positively
That means talking positively about the different options that may have to be explored. Rather than focusing on all the things that may be wrong, concentrate on taking early action to restore good health, which if everything else is all right, may just be the simple decision to buy Cialis. By giving him encouragement, you stand a better chance of being able to work together to solve the problems as they come along. If all you do is to hold up a mirror to his negative feelings, you will both lose out.
This is an emotional minefield for both of you so approach it with care and a commitment to be patient even if his first response if very defensive and dismissive. By whatever means it takes, you need to manoeuvre him towards your family doctor and access to diagnostic services and treatment. This may be the usual case that can be treated with Cialis. You will both be reassured and can begin to restore your mutual confidence in sexual activity. If there are more serious problems of blood circulation or nerve damage, work can begin to address the problems. If the cause is more psychological than physical, counselling may be a useful first step for both of you to take.
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Talking to your Partner can
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Tips for ladies
How you can help your partner |
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| Why you should talk over certain problems with your doctor. And how to do it. |
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